So in the last month I have been on an journey. A journey that I thought I had already been on. A journey I thought I had battled, a journey I thought I already knew EVERYTHING about. A journey of self discovery, of confidence, of trust, of love, of pain, of truth. A journey that I realise is always going to be just that. A journey. An endless journey of self discovery, a journey of finding me. A journey of finding that same love for myself that I have for others without even batting an eyelid. I thought that I had found self confidence that I had found a love for me that I hadn't had before and where I was free from all of THAT only to discover that I was just scratching the surface. That I still have limiting beliefs about my strength, my capabilities and my body. I share because that is what I do. I like to share the truth whether it be that I am in the wrong, or that it something I have triumphed, something I have failed, somethink I have learned, something I don't understand. I just feel that ait is my duty to got through and share what I know and what I don't.
So for me I am learning and growing every single day and I'm actually trying to tap more into my intuition and what it is I feel and notice. I have ALOT of personal inner work to do but I am so signed up for that and want to live the best life that I can. Inside and out. It is finding that balance of alignment with your beliefs, being authentic to yourself and not compromising. As I have been diving in I have been sent some you might say tests and sometimes it is soooo overwhelming. What do I do what road do I take. Do I say yes? Do I say no? Do I train in this? Do I train in that? Am I in alignment of all that I believe? The list goes on and on. So for me if things keep showing up for me then I am going to study them further and see if this is something that I feel that I may need to delve into. It is funny how things show up for you either as a lesson or a path once you are open to it and you start to SEE. I decided that I was going to trust myself. I was going to trust that I choose the path (that has already been set for me) I was going to trust the Universe, Mother Earth, God Or Spirit, or what ever it is you resonate with I usually use Universe. So for me this has led to a path of finding myself and doing the inner work. Learning to REALLY love me. I have changed a lot in that department but I also have a very long way to go. I realise that a lot of that is stagnant in my body and dates back to childhood, stories, beliefs, things that have happened and just the way that I feel I was conditioned. Well I am learning to change these stories. They do not need to be my story. Being FAT is not my story, being poor is not my story, being inadequate is not my story. My story is what I make my story. So I am abundant in all areas of my life, Family, Wealth, Love and Fun. I am a healthy woman who is sexy as hell and who has a lot more to her that that. I am smart and savvy and creative and kind and funny and human.
So for me what has come up Is that I am writing a book, documenting this journey and I am about to train in ( NLP Neuro Linguistics Programming) so that I can help others get rid of their blocks and barriers and to help them to change their stories. It has led me to create a Wellness Workshop that is helping other local wellness businesses get their names out there. In our local community. It has led me to rethink the price for my program and offer it for a price I feel in alignment with a price that helps me help more people. I have been more in tune with nature and often go out and ground myself in the earth. I never realised why I always felt so good when I was outside and am learning the benefits of the energy around it. I am bringing more like minded people into my circle. People with values similar to mine. People who get me and don't judge me. I now speak my truth ( a tiny bit ) but that is better than I was before. Never wanting to upset anyone. Never wanting to say what I really thought but the only person suffering was me so that is something I'm learning and putting into action. And guess what there has never been an issue around it.
I am really focused on my business and serving as many people as I can. Because the girls who have already used it are having incredible results I really want as many people to get started on it as possible. It is my greatest passion helping (especially women) find themselves again and finding who they are and things that they love about them. Not being to hard on themselves for being human and just celebrating the wonderfulness that they are.
I am now trying to learn to only do what lights up my soul. ( Of course I still need to do the washing ) but I am only choosing things that I feel are for the greater good. So I will be sharing with you more often as I have had a break but this is so therapeutic and I get to share it with you. I am truly blessed.
Erin.